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Donkey, 2005 by Zhan
H ere´s hoping the luck of the Chinese follows Charles Saatchi´s latest venture into gallery ownership. He certainly needs it after the eviction in 2005 from the County Hall on the South Bank, and the closure of his first venue in a St John´s Wood paint factory (disused, I hasten to add, though I do speculate whether the previous incumbents left a few samples for Saatchi´s stable of Young British Artists to use!). So now we have the launch of “Saatchi III” (my title) in Chelsea – at the old Duke of York´s barracks, as a matter of fact. And what a magnificent setting it is with it´s many large and fabulously lit rooms, Doric columns and a glorious 205 year history. The magnificent entrance to the gallery (which has taken 3 years to get ready for the momentous opening last Thursday 9th October (see how up to date we are at RTN – fresher than today´s bread!) surely houses some awe-inspiring work of art. WRONG! Behind that marvellous façade lay a number of imaginary mutants, naked migrant workers – all suspended from the ceiling. And it gets worse, believe you me. To say this is an exhibition of contemporary Chinese art would have the ancients spinning in their tombs.
One room (dominated by the works of Sun Yuan and Peng Yu) features a load of very elderly men (lifelike and lifesize sculptures) in wheelchairs. Bearing remarkable likenesses to Bill Clinton, Saddam Hussein and Yasser Arafat with lolling heads (at least they fell short of having them dribble), these unfortunates actually move of their own accord and bump into each other in a macabre and, to me, tasteless version of dodgem cars. When I tell you that these two examples represent the highlight of what´s appearing here, then you may wonder – or dread – what the rest is like. And I´m not going to spare either your feelings or your blushes. How do you feel about gazing at a badly constructed and tiny city made out of dog chews (doubtless made in China and, who knows, perhaps containing some home-grown melamine!). How about the so-called “history painting” that shows Chairman Mao sitting at the back of McCarthy hearing (remember the rabid American anti-communist loon?). Or just to get your artistic juices flowing, pin your gaze on the giant turd (yes, I did say that!) that contains miniature, semi-digested toy soldiers. Thank god it isn´t life-size like the wheelchair-bound geriatric composition.
For those of you disposed more towards erotic art, then I commend to you the stuffed donkey with a scaffold pole erection attempting to copulate with Shanghai´s tallest building. And if that rocks your boat, I hope I don´t know you! Why? I mean, why the subject? Why is it art? And why have this insult to cultural intelligence being exhibited in the first place? We all know Saatchi is no stranger to controversy (a great patron of Damien, of course), and we all know his ad agency background supposedly loving visual puns, according to his PR people. But for heaven´s sake, why this collection of second rate rubbish? Filling 13 galleries over 4 floors, Charles has allegedly spent upwards of 3 million smackers to enable him to shock and dismay most right-minded art lovers but on Press night he refused to talk to the Press. Perhaps embarrassment overcame him at the last minute – though I doubt it! Well, for what it´s worth, your own RTN art columnist reckons he could have spent that amount more creatively: buying himself another Tracy Emin, or emulating J K Rowling and donating it to his buddy, Bumbler Brown! Those of you who know me will realise how aghast I am at this wanton two fingers to the public, for me to suggest giving a red cent to this government!
Important message to our young artists...The closing date for our Javea Players/Studio 5 “Wind in the Willows” art competition is rapidly approaching. As the winning entries will feature in the official programme, the closing date is strictly set down by the publisher´s deadline. So please keep those entries coming but do remember that the last date for acceptance is 13th October (and not, as mentioned in an article in last week´s edition of RTN, the 30th). So get your skates on, kids, and paint like the Wind (in the Willows, gettit??). As you know, I always like to finish with an exhortation to you to enjoy your art. I find it difficult this week for quite obvious reasons, so I´ll just close by saying I´m looking forward to enjoying the great competition entries from our talented youngsters.
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